My Birthday

Tomorrow, I'm another year older. How old I will be does not really matter. What is more important is that I have made a leap-change, something that was triggered by Pinggoy's blog (http://pingpol.multiply.com/photos/album/12/my_amazing_baby_brother_bajekjek).

I can understand his excitement about having a baby brother, even if its a step-brother. What I find hurtful is when he even posted the other woman's pictures. (He he siguro inggit lang ako na na-post niya yun kaysa a ako.) It came across like he was acknowledging her as his mom, especially for those who really don't know me.)

Oh well, Pinggoy is his own person.

A few weeks ago, I asked Karl and Kathleen (aka Japs) for their opinion about something. (I think I heard Kath mutter something like "Oh no!")

It was really about my relationship (or absence of a relationship) with their Dad.

I told them that I was bothered by my being untruthful to my friends about my separation from Pen, and if it would be alright if I would be more candid with them now that Ping had been posting photos of his step-brother on his site. (Actually, I had never opened it yet then but had been told of it by my sister.)

I said I had always tried to avoid the topic with my friends in deference to their (my children's) feelings.

To my surprise, Kath said she had been telling her friends that I was separated from her dad.

Karl was more quiet, although he did not object.

Now I have to talk to Ping, Alex and Victor to tell them of my intention. I just hope that no one reads this blog yet.

Doing New Things

I thought I would never not have time to try new things on my computer, but with more responsibilities, I just did not anymore have the time to learn to do Photoshop, publish a blog or design a web page.

Well, I don't exactly still have time to learn new things, but working for an online publication has helped "force" me to put this kind of learning into my list of urgent to-dos.

I may end up being a weekend blogger, especially since my present job does not allow me the luxury of writing something for this site in the evenings (I'm just too tired or may just want to do something else away from the computer).

I wonder what the children would think if they knew I now have a blog ... and what I intend to do with this blog.

At the moment, I'm still thinking how much I can really publish without stirring too much of a ruckus. Hmmm. We'll see. This is all so new to me but have sure opened new energies. Like, I'd like to enroll once again in a yoga class. Or pilates. Or both.

I could also look for a good bar, somewhere I could hang out in the evenings and just drink, drink, drink without fear of being harassed. Ha ha, as if someone might be interested in picking me up.

Gosh, I miss the debates and gossip that come with being with the Philippine media. Really time now to do something about this.

Dala nang Ina

Papaano nga ba nagpapalaki ng mga anak nang mag-isa?

Actually, hindi naman talaga mag-isa kasi minsan-minsan, lalo na pag wala nang allowance ang mga bata, dumadaan ang ama nila.

Otherwise, ako ang tatay at nanay nila.

Malalaki na ang mga anak ko. Pero mababait naman sila generally speaking. Except for the inability of most of my boys to pursue their college schooling, I guess I could count myself lucky to have such children.

Freedom!

The courage to end a marriage had not been too difficult. What was harder was admitting to all and everyone that my marriage had ended. Aside from the children, only my dearest friend -- and of course my family and some members of his family -- knew that we were no longer a couple.

Then recently, one of my son's blogs showed pictures of my ex and his youngest child with his live-in woman. This gave me the courage to "come out" and start a new life.

Never too late!

Now over 50, I know I have a lot of catching up to do.

But what lies ahead?

Romance? A new career? Adventures?